Games
Veins Like Tapeworms
Veins Like Tapeworms (hereby refered to as VLT) is a horror visual novel by AwesomeTrinket. Now available on Steam here: (Outgoing Link) LINK
What was originally a demo during the Themed Horror RPG Maker Gamejam (as well as a few others) hosted by Beregon over on itch.io, VLT immediately caught my attention if not for the dark premise, then for the idea of a visual novel being made so intricately using RPG Maker MZ as an engine for it!
I was around during some early development, and after playing the chapter 1 demo, I couldn't stop thinking about it and the star of the title, Demian and their personal struggles. I wanted to know more about them. I wanted to know just where this horror story was going!
Screenshot
VLT, again, is a visual novel made in Rpg Maker MZ. Most people might be aware, but its not normally an engine people think of when they consider making a visual novel. I think AwesomeTrinket did a phenomenal job with the plugins, tweaks and other assets she needed to be able to make this experience feel unique and fresh.
Every little bit is carefully considered- from the atmospheric sound effects, to the text animation and delivery of written lines, to the music and of course visuals; this game struck me immediately for its creativity with the engine first and foremost.
And then... there's the actual story. The real, horrifying story that truly lives up to its name. Feeling like there's Tapeworms in your Veins. Swirling, malgamation of sorrow, dread and rot.
Screenshot
Demian is a non-binary individual who's working a really shit job for pennies, down on their luck (to put it lightly), and just trying to make it by. We're initially greeted to some of their most extreme cleanup situations, working in housekeeping for a dingy motel near Kingsfield Beach, a place similar to Las Vegas.
Anyone who's worked in housekeeping can tell you; its brutal at times. For Demian, its probably some of the worst, biohazardous jobs they've had the displeasure of working for. But what else do they have? They're making ends meet, and barely that.
Paying for what little they can. Food, the occasional drink, hell, they're lucky to be able to have a roof over their head, whether its by the "oh so good grace" of the motel owner, aka Demian's boss. They're allowed to live at the motel they work at, but living conditions are less than ideal.
Grungy. Dingy. Dirty, filth. Demian is far too exhausted and worn down by their daily bullshit to really have to worry about their living space. That's not to say they're not suffering because of it, of course. But what can you do when you're worked beyond overtime, without the additional pay? At least working would be enough to dull the mindlessness of life, right?
No, Demian Zhao has it ROUGH to put it lightly. We find out throughout the story, just what terrible circumstances brought them to such a state- brought them way out here, at the end of their rope, swinging like a pendulum between absolute misery and horror. Just a breath away from snapping and losing it entirely. As if they haven't already faced it all.
Demian, at first, might seem like a cynical brat. A jerk who's had nothing but bad luck from the moment they were born. It sure feels like it, to them. Maybe its less about "luck", and more like they've become bitter and withdrawn to others because its easier than letting them know Demian's own issues. They've been burned before. Never let someone know your weaknesses, or they'll use it against you. That's how it always was, anyway.
Screenshot
Demian happens upon a poor individual vomiting something in a nearby dumpster. We're given one of our first divergences during the visual novel- another factor I really love about this game. Branching paths. There's various endings and outcomes that can differ drastically, depending on the choices you make throughout the game. There is a TRUE ending implemented, but going in blind, its a lot of fun to discover just what little you can do to make or break (literally) this poor person.
Choosing to proceed, Demian witnesses something otherworldly. A glob, a splotch of some sort of entity. It speaks to their mind, their inner psyche. It craves power. It craves despair and festering rot. It says it can let them "Bloom". Surely, this regurgitated mass couldn't be something THAT horrible to trust, right? I mean, the person who vomited it up clearly could not handle it.
But maybe they just weren't ready to give their hand to this god. Maybe its last host was too weak-minded. Too frail and too scared of its power.
But Demian has been burned. Been hurt. Been chewed up, spit up and thrown away themselves. They've created this hardened shell, this outer casing, to protect themselves. Because life is shit. And life hurts so, so bad. And life isn't fair or nice or clean or pretty or safe or loving. So, what do they have to lose?
Moving the story forward, we accept this creature. This mass. This...parasite, into Demian. Literally.
Screenshot
Upon waking up in their dingy motel room, Demian is greeted to a new feeling, a new presence in their mind and body. Later naming them Slyce, Demian is told of how this new being, this THING found in a dumpster, can bring Demian happiness. Anything. To be able to bloom. Of course skeptical, Demian wonders what the catch is. In order to bloom at all, Slyce NEEDS Demian. Now sharing a body as one, its almost like this mysterious creature has opened up itself to Demian- showing its underbelly in mock surrender.
Their pain shared, their sorrows felt together... why would someone, or someTHING go out of its way to help Demian? Why Demian specifically? Were the circumstances just that right? Clearly. We're later shown just how miserable Demian truly is, and just why all of this just seems like too much of a dream come true. If you've been burned, backed down into a corner, your psyche tested again and again, wouldn't you snap?
Depending on what you suggest, its shown throughout the game that Slyce is willing to aid Demian, should they end up in any kind of danger. At the risk of death, Slyce will extend its vines and petals... Needless to say, Demian keeps the symbiote, for now. It craves meat... and that doesn't come cheap. Demian is hardly getting paid the hours worked; they don't exactly have the funds for the "luxury" of meats, when a large pack of instant noodles would feed them for a week. Slyce rather prefers things not so artificial.
Throughout the story, we're shown many characters. Miriam, a girl who works at the local convienence store that Demian frequents. Unfortunately for Demian, it seems Miriam has developed a crush on them... We learn early on that Demian is asexual, including being sex-repulsed. They're not the type of person who is looking for what others might call a "regular relationship." Hell, its hard enough pretending to be friendly. Are they pretending, though? Miriam means well, but her positive attitude is less than contagious when it comes to Demian by comparison.
Miriam, sweet and considerate...she has absolutely no idea what its like to be Demian. To suffer like they have. Day in and day out, wondering if their next meal will be their last. Wondering if there's anything really worth it at the end of trying so hard- what pay off? Miriam wouldn't know. No one would really know. Everyone on the outside is living a far, far better life that Demian, and they know it for sure. its always rubbed in their face, anyway.
Demian is trying to find a way to let Miriam down gently, but its always been a hassle.
There's also one of his coworkers, Margaret (coincidentally, their boss' daughter.) Demian is convinced Margaret hates them, thinks lowly of them like they're something to be pitied. Less than human. One could also argue: Demian might be jealous of Margaret and her relationship with her father. A relationship they themselves never got to have. Of course, we're not told this explicitly.
Thinking Margaret must only be "pretending" to be neutral around Demian, they end up coming up with wild accusations- assumptions that Margaret is far worse than she seems, as a person.
Screenshot
Further still in the game, we learn even more about Demian: including their upbringing with strict parents. A mother who was never happy with anything they tried, a father who would never be proud. Always one step behind, maybe 10 for all their parents thought.
Demian has a lot more to worry about than this. Especially so, now with their new "companion". This creature, "Slyce", can access Demian's memories...something Demian lays down as something off limits. They're already someone who hardly had reprieve from others' scrutiny growing up; let their mind, their only real sanctuary, be just that! Meaning: LET DEMIAN AT LEAST HAVE THE PRIVACY OF THEIR BROKEN HEART AND MIND.
Agreeing, Slyce still prods periodically. After all, why wouldn't the parasite want its host to be happy and healthy?
What would happiness even look like to someone like Demian? They wouldn't know. If not to make things worse, Demian happens upon their ex from high school. They were less than romantic when they were together. It felt like a thing of happenstance- both Demian and Wikus had english as their second language, and would later learn that they weren't cis (Demian being non-binary and Wikus being transmale), it felt like it made sense.
But that alone wasnt enough to keep whatever they were doing, whatever kind of "relationship" together. Maybe neither of them really wanted it anyway.
Wikus, despite being trans, was welcomed and accepted as himself. His family seems happy. And its a horrifying contrast compared to Demian. Demian, having been kicked out of their home after being outed as non-binary to their very rigid parents. Demian, who never told their parents anything- never wanted to, never felt love or safety, why the hell would they?? Demian, who was left to rot in the gutter, while Wikus got everything. Everyone is always much, much better off than Demian.
And it hurts so, so fucking much.
Screenshot
Continuing, you're given multiple opportunities to harm others. Slyce craves meat. Craves to "protect" Demian from those around them. Slyce feeds off their misery. Who in the whole world could be less miserable than them at this very moment? In their own world. In Demian's own world, they're the loneliest.
As someone who has played the true ending: I was thrown for a complete loop. When I first played the demo way back when, I had a completely different idea about who or what Demian was like as a person. We only had one chapter to go off of, and in my mind, I had assumed Demian was just a brat, a really unfortunate person who was a jerk and was handed a magic lamp- a recipe for disaster, right?
I could not be more wrong, considering all that occurs in the final version.
Demian, in my mind, is far more complex than some "evil/angry person without redemption". They're completely more nuanced than "The worst person you know just got godly powers". No, Demian is what you see when you have it all taken from you. Speaking as someone with familial trauma, someone who is also non-binary... it all hits very close to home.
Demian, wasn't ever given the love and care they deserved, growing up. From birth, they were always failing. One step short. Just not enough no matter what. Stand up straight. Don't touch that, you're embarrassing us as your parents. Maybe you wouldn't look that way if you'd learn how to take care of yourself like anyone else. Vile. Horrible. Treated as "less-than". Worth less. Lesser. Why? People and movies and books keep saying things like "family is everything!" and "at least you'll always have family!" What a bunch of fairytale nonsense.
To Demian, it really was just that. Nonsense. After all, they've never experienced happiness in that way. How could they? Oh. Right. They didn't deserve it. They didn't deserve love, and compassion and safety, and acceptance. Why? Just why wasn't Demian enough for their parents? Was it not worth it to love what they created? Is this what life is supposed to be like? Why does it hurt so bad?
Screenshot
To me, I feel Demian is like a feral animal. Or, more like an abandoned stray. "Oh, its so filthy, don't touch it!" but, its still a living creature. its just trying to live. Demian is just trying to fucking live, and only ever knew pain and ignorance and hopelessness. Of course they'd be wary of any outstretched hand.
And if someone so much as tries, then they'll be scratched, bitten and made to regret even trying. Because if you're going to be hurt, why not hurt them first, right? Or, at least, if you bite them first, then they'll know you're not weak. Stay away- I'm dangerous! I'm unlovable! I'm disgusting! ...But Slyce doesn't think so.
That's a lie, right? There's no way. There's absolutely no way a single thing, Earthling or not, that would find someone like Demian "worthy" of acceptance.
Right?
Screenshot
This game occupied my life after the true ending, for a long while. As of writing, its still in my mind. It still haunts my psyche, seeing them. Seeing Demian, a lonely person, a burned, broken and kicked to the curb ...being. Just... want love. Not romantic love. Just.
And, why not? Why don't they deserve love and acceptance? Huh? Horrible circumstances and shitty parents. A stew of despair and loneliness. When I look at Demian, I see utter loneliness. I've seen it in reality, often. I sometimes feel so relatable to certain aspects of Demian's torture, it makes me weep.
Slyce wants to bloom? Demian is already a seed, too. Buried deep beneath layer upon layer upon layer of sorrow, loneliness, and ROT... there's a small thing. There's a tiny kernel of what was once human. The tiniest thing that encompasses what they crave the most, what they long for.
When you're this small, this vulnerable, you need to encase yourself. You need to be protected. Slyce will do that for them. Slyce is the hand that never was, and cupped Demian, small and frail, and told them "I'll do it for you. Let me be the one to save you."
Just when was that right ever given to Demian? Just when was the last time they were told by someone else "not to worry", and "let me handle it"? Without sarcasm? Without the lingering bitterness, without you standing in the corner, unable to move while you watch your parent angrily clean up a mess that you didn't even create?
Was there ever a time in Demian's life, that they were told "its ok", and meant it??
Screenshot
To bloom means much more than just opening your mind to the possibility of something loving you. It means accepting this...thing, as an extension of yourself. You'll become monstrous, bloodthirsty. Your inner self will crave it- crave the sinew and the carnage and it'll all be under the guise of keeping you "safe".
Is it just that, though? Is this parasitic union truly onesided like that? Slyce does what it can to keep Demian safe. It'll suggest going as far as possible in instances. Destroy. Kill. Consume. Again...even this thing wants to live.
To live with this creature- you're giving up a part of yourself. Slyce feeds off of that despair, though. Keeping Demian at that point of misery where they'll be easily coaxed into doing something they can't ever take back. It makes them really consider, really wonder..."Is it worth it, to be able to "bloom"? To be able to feel truly "happy"?"
its more nuanced, more complex than simply chasing the high of being some sort of invincible god. Some sort of all powerful creature just for the fun of it. Demian's only ever wanted to be seen, be accepted. Slyce, not human nor understanding complex emotions of them at times, is willing to learn. To understand. To nurture- but its also still just that: inhuman. It craves this rot. This festering mess in Demian's marrow.
Of course, this is all in the way this game made me feel. When playing the game, I was invested in the beautiful writing styles of AwesomeTrinket. A fan of tragedy, I adored this piece of art. It was made with a lot of care, and a lot of passion.
Depending on your choices, you can choose what path to take Demian on. A cowards way for one. Will you let them keep pretending things will be ok? Or will you let them find out what they really want? Or would you rather them give themselves up entirely?
Each route feels so fleshed out and flows naturally no matter what you end up choosing. I hope, if you decide to play, you'll try for more than just one ending. The True Ending is something that will live in my mind for a long while, I think.
Demian is such a complex, well-written character. I feel for them, I no longer see them as some crude, snide individual with a stick up their ass. They're something more, someone written to be so multifaceted, so heartbreakingly lonely, I don't think I could help but be fascinated by them.
I think I'll keep thinking about Demian, about Veins Like Tapeworms, for a long time. Reading and re-reading has already been a pleasure, discovering new things to think about, personally.
Playing this game hurts my heart, but it also fascinates me. its beautiful, and its rotten.
And I really, really loved it.
What was originally a demo during the Themed Horror RPG Maker Gamejam (as well as a few others) hosted by Beregon over on itch.io, VLT immediately caught my attention if not for the dark premise, then for the idea of a visual novel being made so intricately using RPG Maker MZ as an engine for it!
I was around during some early development, and after playing the chapter 1 demo, I couldn't stop thinking about it and the star of the title, Demian and their personal struggles. I wanted to know more about them. I wanted to know just where this horror story was going!
VLT, again, is a visual novel made in Rpg Maker MZ. Most people might be aware, but its not normally an engine people think of when they consider making a visual novel. I think AwesomeTrinket did a phenomenal job with the plugins, tweaks and other assets she needed to be able to make this experience feel unique and fresh.
Every little bit is carefully considered- from the atmospheric sound effects, to the text animation and delivery of written lines, to the music and of course visuals; this game struck me immediately for its creativity with the engine first and foremost.
And then... there's the actual story. The real, horrifying story that truly lives up to its name. Feeling like there's Tapeworms in your Veins. Swirling, malgamation of sorrow, dread and rot.
Demian is a non-binary individual who's working a really shit job for pennies, down on their luck (to put it lightly), and just trying to make it by. We're initially greeted to some of their most extreme cleanup situations, working in housekeeping for a dingy motel near Kingsfield Beach, a place similar to Las Vegas.
Anyone who's worked in housekeeping can tell you; its brutal at times. For Demian, its probably some of the worst, biohazardous jobs they've had the displeasure of working for. But what else do they have? They're making ends meet, and barely that.
Paying for what little they can. Food, the occasional drink, hell, they're lucky to be able to have a roof over their head, whether its by the "oh so good grace" of the motel owner, aka Demian's boss. They're allowed to live at the motel they work at, but living conditions are less than ideal.
Grungy. Dingy. Dirty, filth. Demian is far too exhausted and worn down by their daily bullshit to really have to worry about their living space. That's not to say they're not suffering because of it, of course. But what can you do when you're worked beyond overtime, without the additional pay? At least working would be enough to dull the mindlessness of life, right?
No, Demian Zhao has it ROUGH to put it lightly. We find out throughout the story, just what terrible circumstances brought them to such a state- brought them way out here, at the end of their rope, swinging like a pendulum between absolute misery and horror. Just a breath away from snapping and losing it entirely. As if they haven't already faced it all.
Demian, at first, might seem like a cynical brat. A jerk who's had nothing but bad luck from the moment they were born. It sure feels like it, to them. Maybe its less about "luck", and more like they've become bitter and withdrawn to others because its easier than letting them know Demian's own issues. They've been burned before. Never let someone know your weaknesses, or they'll use it against you. That's how it always was, anyway.
Demian happens upon a poor individual vomiting something in a nearby dumpster. We're given one of our first divergences during the visual novel- another factor I really love about this game. Branching paths. There's various endings and outcomes that can differ drastically, depending on the choices you make throughout the game. There is a TRUE ending implemented, but going in blind, its a lot of fun to discover just what little you can do to make or break (literally) this poor person.
Choosing to proceed, Demian witnesses something otherworldly. A glob, a splotch of some sort of entity. It speaks to their mind, their inner psyche. It craves power. It craves despair and festering rot. It says it can let them "Bloom". Surely, this regurgitated mass couldn't be something THAT horrible to trust, right? I mean, the person who vomited it up clearly could not handle it.
But maybe they just weren't ready to give their hand to this god. Maybe its last host was too weak-minded. Too frail and too scared of its power.
But Demian has been burned. Been hurt. Been chewed up, spit up and thrown away themselves. They've created this hardened shell, this outer casing, to protect themselves. Because life is shit. And life hurts so, so bad. And life isn't fair or nice or clean or pretty or safe or loving. So, what do they have to lose?
Moving the story forward, we accept this creature. This mass. This...parasite, into Demian. Literally.
Upon waking up in their dingy motel room, Demian is greeted to a new feeling, a new presence in their mind and body. Later naming them Slyce, Demian is told of how this new being, this THING found in a dumpster, can bring Demian happiness. Anything. To be able to bloom. Of course skeptical, Demian wonders what the catch is. In order to bloom at all, Slyce NEEDS Demian. Now sharing a body as one, its almost like this mysterious creature has opened up itself to Demian- showing its underbelly in mock surrender.
Their pain shared, their sorrows felt together... why would someone, or someTHING go out of its way to help Demian? Why Demian specifically? Were the circumstances just that right? Clearly. We're later shown just how miserable Demian truly is, and just why all of this just seems like too much of a dream come true. If you've been burned, backed down into a corner, your psyche tested again and again, wouldn't you snap?
Depending on what you suggest, its shown throughout the game that Slyce is willing to aid Demian, should they end up in any kind of danger. At the risk of death, Slyce will extend its vines and petals... Needless to say, Demian keeps the symbiote, for now. It craves meat... and that doesn't come cheap. Demian is hardly getting paid the hours worked; they don't exactly have the funds for the "luxury" of meats, when a large pack of instant noodles would feed them for a week. Slyce rather prefers things not so artificial.
Throughout the story, we're shown many characters. Miriam, a girl who works at the local convienence store that Demian frequents. Unfortunately for Demian, it seems Miriam has developed a crush on them... We learn early on that Demian is asexual, including being sex-repulsed. They're not the type of person who is looking for what others might call a "regular relationship." Hell, its hard enough pretending to be friendly. Are they pretending, though? Miriam means well, but her positive attitude is less than contagious when it comes to Demian by comparison.
Miriam, sweet and considerate...she has absolutely no idea what its like to be Demian. To suffer like they have. Day in and day out, wondering if their next meal will be their last. Wondering if there's anything really worth it at the end of trying so hard- what pay off? Miriam wouldn't know. No one would really know. Everyone on the outside is living a far, far better life that Demian, and they know it for sure. its always rubbed in their face, anyway.
Demian is trying to find a way to let Miriam down gently, but its always been a hassle.
There's also one of his coworkers, Margaret (coincidentally, their boss' daughter.) Demian is convinced Margaret hates them, thinks lowly of them like they're something to be pitied. Less than human. One could also argue: Demian might be jealous of Margaret and her relationship with her father. A relationship they themselves never got to have. Of course, we're not told this explicitly.
Thinking Margaret must only be "pretending" to be neutral around Demian, they end up coming up with wild accusations- assumptions that Margaret is far worse than she seems, as a person.
Further still in the game, we learn even more about Demian: including their upbringing with strict parents. A mother who was never happy with anything they tried, a father who would never be proud. Always one step behind, maybe 10 for all their parents thought.
Demian has a lot more to worry about than this. Especially so, now with their new "companion". This creature, "Slyce", can access Demian's memories...something Demian lays down as something off limits. They're already someone who hardly had reprieve from others' scrutiny growing up; let their mind, their only real sanctuary, be just that! Meaning: LET DEMIAN AT LEAST HAVE THE PRIVACY OF THEIR BROKEN HEART AND MIND.
Agreeing, Slyce still prods periodically. After all, why wouldn't the parasite want its host to be happy and healthy?
What would happiness even look like to someone like Demian? They wouldn't know. If not to make things worse, Demian happens upon their ex from high school. They were less than romantic when they were together. It felt like a thing of happenstance- both Demian and Wikus had english as their second language, and would later learn that they weren't cis (Demian being non-binary and Wikus being transmale), it felt like it made sense.
But that alone wasnt enough to keep whatever they were doing, whatever kind of "relationship" together. Maybe neither of them really wanted it anyway.
Wikus, despite being trans, was welcomed and accepted as himself. His family seems happy. And its a horrifying contrast compared to Demian. Demian, having been kicked out of their home after being outed as non-binary to their very rigid parents. Demian, who never told their parents anything- never wanted to, never felt love or safety, why the hell would they?? Demian, who was left to rot in the gutter, while Wikus got everything. Everyone is always much, much better off than Demian.
And it hurts so, so fucking much.
Continuing, you're given multiple opportunities to harm others. Slyce craves meat. Craves to "protect" Demian from those around them. Slyce feeds off their misery. Who in the whole world could be less miserable than them at this very moment? In their own world. In Demian's own world, they're the loneliest.
As someone who has played the true ending: I was thrown for a complete loop. When I first played the demo way back when, I had a completely different idea about who or what Demian was like as a person. We only had one chapter to go off of, and in my mind, I had assumed Demian was just a brat, a really unfortunate person who was a jerk and was handed a magic lamp- a recipe for disaster, right?
I could not be more wrong, considering all that occurs in the final version.
Demian, in my mind, is far more complex than some "evil/angry person without redemption". They're completely more nuanced than "The worst person you know just got godly powers". No, Demian is what you see when you have it all taken from you. Speaking as someone with familial trauma, someone who is also non-binary... it all hits very close to home.
Demian, wasn't ever given the love and care they deserved, growing up. From birth, they were always failing. One step short. Just not enough no matter what. Stand up straight. Don't touch that, you're embarrassing us as your parents. Maybe you wouldn't look that way if you'd learn how to take care of yourself like anyone else. Vile. Horrible. Treated as "less-than". Worth less. Lesser. Why? People and movies and books keep saying things like "family is everything!" and "at least you'll always have family!" What a bunch of fairytale nonsense.
To Demian, it really was just that. Nonsense. After all, they've never experienced happiness in that way. How could they? Oh. Right. They didn't deserve it. They didn't deserve love, and compassion and safety, and acceptance. Why? Just why wasn't Demian enough for their parents? Was it not worth it to love what they created? Is this what life is supposed to be like? Why does it hurt so bad?
To me, I feel Demian is like a feral animal. Or, more like an abandoned stray. "Oh, its so filthy, don't touch it!" but, its still a living creature. its just trying to live. Demian is just trying to fucking live, and only ever knew pain and ignorance and hopelessness. Of course they'd be wary of any outstretched hand.
And if someone so much as tries, then they'll be scratched, bitten and made to regret even trying. Because if you're going to be hurt, why not hurt them first, right? Or, at least, if you bite them first, then they'll know you're not weak. Stay away- I'm dangerous! I'm unlovable! I'm disgusting! ...But Slyce doesn't think so.
That's a lie, right? There's no way. There's absolutely no way a single thing, Earthling or not, that would find someone like Demian "worthy" of acceptance.
Right?
This game occupied my life after the true ending, for a long while. As of writing, its still in my mind. It still haunts my psyche, seeing them. Seeing Demian, a lonely person, a burned, broken and kicked to the curb ...being. Just... want love. Not romantic love. Just.
And, why not? Why don't they deserve love and acceptance? Huh? Horrible circumstances and shitty parents. A stew of despair and loneliness. When I look at Demian, I see utter loneliness. I've seen it in reality, often. I sometimes feel so relatable to certain aspects of Demian's torture, it makes me weep.
Slyce wants to bloom? Demian is already a seed, too. Buried deep beneath layer upon layer upon layer of sorrow, loneliness, and ROT... there's a small thing. There's a tiny kernel of what was once human. The tiniest thing that encompasses what they crave the most, what they long for.
When you're this small, this vulnerable, you need to encase yourself. You need to be protected. Slyce will do that for them. Slyce is the hand that never was, and cupped Demian, small and frail, and told them "I'll do it for you. Let me be the one to save you."
Just when was that right ever given to Demian? Just when was the last time they were told by someone else "not to worry", and "let me handle it"? Without sarcasm? Without the lingering bitterness, without you standing in the corner, unable to move while you watch your parent angrily clean up a mess that you didn't even create?
Was there ever a time in Demian's life, that they were told "its ok", and meant it??
To bloom means much more than just opening your mind to the possibility of something loving you. It means accepting this...thing, as an extension of yourself. You'll become monstrous, bloodthirsty. Your inner self will crave it- crave the sinew and the carnage and it'll all be under the guise of keeping you "safe".
Is it just that, though? Is this parasitic union truly onesided like that? Slyce does what it can to keep Demian safe. It'll suggest going as far as possible in instances. Destroy. Kill. Consume. Again...even this thing wants to live.
To live with this creature- you're giving up a part of yourself. Slyce feeds off of that despair, though. Keeping Demian at that point of misery where they'll be easily coaxed into doing something they can't ever take back. It makes them really consider, really wonder..."Is it worth it, to be able to "bloom"? To be able to feel truly "happy"?"
its more nuanced, more complex than simply chasing the high of being some sort of invincible god. Some sort of all powerful creature just for the fun of it. Demian's only ever wanted to be seen, be accepted. Slyce, not human nor understanding complex emotions of them at times, is willing to learn. To understand. To nurture- but its also still just that: inhuman. It craves this rot. This festering mess in Demian's marrow.
Of course, this is all in the way this game made me feel. When playing the game, I was invested in the beautiful writing styles of AwesomeTrinket. A fan of tragedy, I adored this piece of art. It was made with a lot of care, and a lot of passion.
Depending on your choices, you can choose what path to take Demian on. A cowards way for one. Will you let them keep pretending things will be ok? Or will you let them find out what they really want? Or would you rather them give themselves up entirely?
Each route feels so fleshed out and flows naturally no matter what you end up choosing. I hope, if you decide to play, you'll try for more than just one ending. The True Ending is something that will live in my mind for a long while, I think.
Demian is such a complex, well-written character. I feel for them, I no longer see them as some crude, snide individual with a stick up their ass. They're something more, someone written to be so multifaceted, so heartbreakingly lonely, I don't think I could help but be fascinated by them.
I think I'll keep thinking about Demian, about Veins Like Tapeworms, for a long time. Reading and re-reading has already been a pleasure, discovering new things to think about, personally.
Playing this game hurts my heart, but it also fascinates me. its beautiful, and its rotten.
And I really, really loved it.
